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Carolyn Hax: ten years following the divorce proceedings, it is time for you to find the antidote to your venom

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Carolyn Hax: ten years following the divorce proceedings, it is time for you to find the antidote to your venom

Carolyn Hax is away. The after first appeared Jan. 14, 2005.

Dear Carolyn: my hubby and I also divorced bitterly a decade ago. Final 12 months he made remarks and did things that allow me to (and others) understand he nevertheless has feelings for me. It was done despite the fact that he remarried and it has a child on the way. It absolutely was knowledge that is common he married away from monetary prerequisite.

Once I told him I would inform their spouse, their only remark had been, “cannot inform her like this.” It sounded like he had been trying to find means away from their wedding. Right after, their spouse and I also had a quarrel and we shared with her the way I felt.

Now this “churchgoing, Christian” guy has convinced their spouse i am made and crazy every thing up. I am ashamed I ever paid attention to him and today he is hated by me inside your. I have tried many times to inform their spouse the entire truth, but she does not want to concentrate.

The thing is he and I also have actually young ones together and I also experience their hatred and hostility. Just how do we manage this case?

— Wanting the truth that is whole Be Told

Wanting the truth that is whole Be Told: No, the issue is that you’re a continuing way to obtain the hatred and hostility.

Listed here are absolutely none of the business that is hmm-hmm. Your ex-husband’s marriage that is current. 2. Why your ex-husband joined their present wedding. 3. How your ex-husband currently feels about their present wife. 4. What your ex-husband informs their present spouse. 5. I’m too frustrated to think about it at this time.

You aren’t telling a “truth,” entire or else. You have got hunches, conjecture, wishful thinking.

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